Have just said goodbye to Gary. Not really sure what else to say - have had lots of thoughts flying round my head - not particularly happy ones. Two things may be worth mentioning - one is that however painful and seemingly cruel it might seem for me to lose Gary, God knows what he's doing and is doing it for the best. Golden rule: never blame God. He can be responsible for something but he's never at fault. Second thing is that I feel it's right, like it would be at a death, to thank God for the gift Gary's been to me. Gary has listened, shared, cared and loved, and been generally cool - thank you God for putting him here for a couple of years! And the good thing is, he hasn't gone - nothing will be the same, but then things never are - change is good - painful, but good.
Will have to get closer to God from now on, anyway - will need him more than ever, and could especially do with having some inkling of his plans concerning me - not a requirement (I don't require things of God, he's given me enough already) - it'd just be nice! So as always, on with the armour, and getting ready to give up everything I've got if required - possessions, human contact, abilities, arms, legs, sight, mind, life - sack it, the game's been won already, I'm 7 years into bonus time - not a bad score on the whole! So let's see what else can be done...
On a perhaps more human-sounding note, am going to see Phil in the morning - supposed to be getting up in four and a half hours, and setting off in six! Excitement just beginning to resurface from the not-very-happiness of saying goodbye to Gaz - honestly, Gary, you do pick your moments for leaving! Mind you, nothing beats Phil's deciding to go off to bible college on my 18th birthday! Nice present! Some people...
So will have almost a week where life is a joyful and precious thing, and no-one will ask me to do anything (except God, and maybe Phil, and Pastor Joyce - but three people is probably manageable!). It'll be good, anyway.....better sign off here so I don't fall asleep while driving tomorrow!